n. def. "A young man with money to spend, living in or within easy reach of a metropolis-because that's where all the best shops, clubs, gyms and hairdressers are ... he has clearly taken himself as his own love object and pleasure as his sexual preference."

-Mark Simpson, inventor of the term, salon.com.

XX: I see them on television, I see them on magazine covers, I see them on the streets of New York and Los Angeles. I have no problem with good grooming and nice hair on my men, but since when do these attributes earn one a new nomenclature?

XY: You see, I used to think that metrosexuals were the invention of the media-call it the nasty by-product of "Queer Eye for the Straight Guy." Then I realized media overexposure wasn't to blame; metrosexuals have become so entrenched that they've inspired a veritable backlash.

XX: Backlash is right! How can we take the metrosexual seriously when Howard Dean called himself a member of their ranks just months ago? Clearly it did much for him in the state of Iowa. Aaaaaaah! As far as I know, all of the presidential candidates shower on a daily basis and comb their hair. Do we really need a term for what I consider good taste?

XY: Yes, if only because the presidential candidates by definition cannot be called metrosexuals. Past a certain age, and outside of a metropolis (note to Howard Dean: Burlington, Vt. is not, most definitely, New York City), you cannot join their exclusive ranks. Either way, though, I think the real point is being lost on the general public-

XX: -And that would be?

XY: Love them or hate them, metrosexuals are ushering in a new age of male-female equality.

XX: I hate to say it, but I like that. If we (and by "we" I mean women) are going to rail against double standards and glass ceilings, we can simultaneously erase other double standards by raising the bar for male hygiene, fashion, etc.-what the Fab Five brings to the poor, straight guys they rescue.

XY: I don't care how "straight" you are, how many beers you can funnel, how many times you can rep 200 pounds-if you're like me, and most guys I know, you expect your woman to be "maintained." And if you expect her to wax, tweeze, trim or shave, then the least you can do is comb your fucking hair. Put another way: you have no right to expect her to do all the things girls do. If she does, be grateful. Then reciprocate. If she doesn't, then how much time and energy you spend is entirely up to you.

XX: I'm going to withold comment on your expectations regarding pubic hair. However, I did like that bit about "reciprocating." I, for one, spent 45 minutes in the waiting room of my local salon on my last day of break because I had to have Inna wax my eyebrows. Whatever they're going to call themselves (and I'd rather they called themselves nothing), I'm all for men who care more about their own appearances than Sportscenter. Or at least half as much.