MATT BEVERS '01

"Because they all have an inferiority complex."

SEAN STAFFORD '04

"They suck because they have too many hills and no towns."

JOHN PETTEY '01

"They've got a football coach who's a Dick."

GEORGE TSAI '02

"Professor Nicholson went there."

PHOEBE STONE '04

"Because it's not Amherst."

HAN CHEN '03

"They're in the middle of nowhere with no contact with anyone, so they suck at everything because they don't know what's going on in the world."

AMBER STROUD '02E

"In lexigrams, Amherst has the word 'star' in it, and every one of our football players is a star, and Williams ain't got no stars."

CARY BECKWITH '01E

"So, what's the big deal with cows?"

KENNETH LEE '03

"So they can swallow."