It was only when I sat down later that night to start composing the treatise you are currently reading that I realized the Super Bowl is not sufficient in scope for an opinion piece. Therefore, I was left with a dilemma; which aspect of the game most warranted my commentary? Should I focus on NFL MVP and Raiders' quarterback Rich Gannon's propensity to throw the ball, as well as the game, away? Should I write about Tampa Bay's rise to football supremacy after a long, mostly forgettable history? Or should I follow the lead of the popular press by largely ignoring the game and focusing instead on the advertisements? While Reebok's hilarious "Office Linebacker" spot was probably the evening's highlight for most Raider fans, other than the thrill of post-game rioting and looting on the streets of Oakland, I felt as if my column ought to address an aspect of the Super Bowl which hadn't gotten quite as much attention as it deserved. Therefore, it was with a great sense of purpose that I decided to write about pirates.
Dubbed "The Swashbuckler's Bowl" by ESPN, Sunday night's game between the Raiders and the Buccaneers was a sort of coming-out party for pirates the world over. After years of relative disregard and neglect, two bands of bandits were invited onto national prime time television. While the pirates in question were clad in shoulder pads and helmets, their ferocious struggles on the gridiron brought the plight of all pirates into a clearer perspective. After all, when was the last time that roguish maritime thieves made such a successful public appearance? The lack of pirates in our everyday lives is especially baffling when we ask who doesn't love a good peg-legged, one-eyed scoundrel of the sea, especially one with a loyal parrot on his shoulder?
The answer, apparently, is the American public. There is no doubt that pirates performed an important role in American history. During the Revolutionary War, the young American government relied upon "privateers" to compliment rebel forces in the Atlantic. Privateers were, in essence, pirates who were recognized by an actual government through a letter of marque and reprisal. These privateers were a crucial part of our domestic defense from the moment of our nation's birth through the mid-19th century.
In fact, since the Declaration of Paris of 1854, which outlawed privateering was never subscribed to by the United States, my roommate has repeatedly suggested the possibility of pirating as either summer occupation or future employment. The fact that President Bush is probably not often approached by young go-getters with requests for such letters, occasionally still accepted under international law though they are, is indicative of America's indifference to the once-respectable profession of piracy.
In fact, not only do parents these days discourage their children from pursuing a career in maritime swashbuckling, but pirates themselves are assailed mercilessly from both the right and the left in the political spectrum. Few minority groups are looked at more unfavorably than pirates, and no one questions the discrimination that pirates face every day of their lives. Because of this, positive role models for aspiring marine bandits are few and far between, making the exploits at wide receivers Joe Jurevicius and Jerry Rice even more important. For well over a century, pirates, from Blackbeard to Captain Hook, have been looked down upon and vilified. Even worse, they have largely been ignored as a subsection of our American landscape. "Where was the clamor from the student-pirate association at the AAS's failure to supply pirates with a diversity seat last year?" a friend of mine queried. Even more importantly, does Amherst even have an organization designed for students interested in buccaneering? What pirates need is a Lorax or an Al Sharpton; they need someone who will speak for their rights. Pirates, after all, have been and continue to be, neglected throughout American society.
When was the last time you saw a pirate walk down the street? If you're like most Americans, you won't be able to answer that question. The only possible explanation for this phenomenon is that today's pirates do not feel welcome and thus refrain from being seen in public. Until the day when pirates are accepted with open arms, they will, as a group, remain disillusioned and unproductive members of society. Can we, as members of a democratic society, live with ourselves if that was to happen? For pirates and their supporters, hope remains that, just maybe, someday there will be a buccaneer in public office. Heck, perhaps even the White House. Portrayals of pirates on the silver screen have been rare, and, for the most part, negative. Who can forget Captain Hook mercilessly kidnapping a grown Peter Pan's children in "Hook?" And what about the wretched Long John Silver's attempts on the life of daring young Jim Hawkins in Robert Louis Stevenson's "Treasure Island." 2003 will see the release of Disney's "Pirates of the Carribean" starring Johnny Depp and Orlando Bloom. Yes, that's the same Orlando Bloom who made elf-loving women everywhere swoon in "Lord of the Rings." However, it remains to be seen whether a movie based on a Disney World ride can make up for years of discrimination and slander aimed at a collective of people whose only real misdeeds have been those of thievery, assault, destruction, pillaging and murder.
For pirates everywhere, the Super Bowl was a first step. Al Davis, the oldest pirate in the NFL, help to show that through perseverance, Raiders can succeed. And Buccaneer Jon Gruden, the youngest coach in professional football, helped romanticize swashbuckling heroics for a whole new generation. However, there's still a long hard road ahead for those who seek to attain respect for a profession that dates back to ancient Greece.
The Buccaneers and Raiders infinitely aided the cause by playing some football Sunday night in brief intervals between big-budget commercials. Now, if only the Pittsburgh Pirates could somehow find their way back to the World Series then maybe the entire profession will again find itself on the road to respectability.